Apr 15
All the men (and most women) I know have one thing in common: They have a zombie contingency plan. If the zombies arise tomorrow, everybody has at least a hazy outline of what, exactly, they would do to survive the coming onslaught. It’s the single best part about the zombie mythos: planning your strategy. So I asked everybody I could think of to submit their own zombie contingency plans, and this is but a small sample of what I received:
Hehe. WARNING: Some salty language awaits.
Imma go visit a kid named “Dungeon Mike”
At work, we have 36 inch cardboard tubes that, in a pinch, could be used to hold them at arm’s length, while someone takes a whack. We also have a ladder to the roof. Oh, and a forklift.
At home, we have bars on the windows and doors; grandpa had been burgled one time too many for his taste. The garage is solid cinderblock, and we have power tools.
LOVE the image.
One thing he brings up in the article is the tendency of stores to use window displays to showcase food and items, thus providing a weak point to the zombie hordes through which to break in and eat our brains. I find this to be fairly untrue; most large stores (especially the big box stores like Wal-Mart or Target) are not much more than glorified warehouses. They have few windows, and though the doors are generally sliding glass doors, they could be easily blocked or reinforced with materials found in the store. The top of the shelves could provide enough distance from hordes should they force entry, and these stores also tend to have several exit-only employee doors which could provide escape in case it’s overrun. And of course, they are filled with food and supplies for a long, drawn-out wait (I live in Alaska, so we’d only need to wait until winter and poof: no more zombies).
I don’t know why everyone wants to go to the supermarket or WalMart or the mall. EVERYONE will be going there, so you’ll have to fight people AND zombies. I want to hide out with a few competent friends …. away from everyone else!
Just ask my english teacher… I did my report over zombies.
I believe Wal-Mart or Target would be BAD decisions, based on that EVERYONE is there when zombies haven’t taken over. Your basic groceries stores like Vons, Ralphs, Krogers, etc should be in and out of b/c of the large window displays and the constant traffic of living. I think your best bet is load up on supplies and find a multi level building with a fire escape and roof access. Fire escape lets you barracade the front entrance and control the back way. And having roof access lets you see whats going on around the city along with being able to grow crops from a rooftop garden AND you can spell HELP US on the roof for planes.
I actually asked O what his zombie plan was on the second episode of his Audiorant. My plan was clearly better and he’s just lying to himself when he denies it.
Our current house isn’t really suited for a zombie apocalypse which is unfortunate. It’s not bad, just not ideal. Our old place was a small “six-pack” of units with all the garages on the bottom floor. We figured we could barricade the stairwells and hole up in our little unit for the first initial panic, while we got ready to move out to my husband’s family home which was out in the middle of nowhere, but still easily reached by us.
Also avoid roads as much as possible and small towns. Don’t know how many apocalypse type movies we’ve seen where people either get stuck in traffic or overrun by desperate people in towns. If you have to take roads be prepared to be ruthless and run people over! In most panic situations other human beings are NOT your friends and are more likely to kill you than what you’re running from.
Sometimes I feel rather silly that we’ve discussed this often enough that I can answer this question easily, but on the otherhand if there ever *is* a zombie apocalypse we won’t be the idiots who repeatedly ask the very obvious zombie shambling towards us if they’re hurt and need help! lol
Also this was in my husband’s wedding vows: “In the unlikely event of a zombie holocaust, I promise to ‘do the right thing’ if you get bit.” I sleep soundly at night knowing that if a zombie bites me, my husband will kill me before I turn. Now that’s love!
wow that is awesome there Helena your husband will put you to rest. its sad but true me and all of my friends have talked about this “Zombie apocalypse” i have to say good lord i really do have a plain…… well i am one of thoes people that every one wants to keep alive since i am prior military with combat time in an actual war 13 months worth and im young strong and i have extensive survival knowledge. i would use my experience to keep me alive and every one else as fodder ….. i know im an A hole like that …. just remember you dont have to run faster than the group of zombies just faster than the guy next to you
I live in Florida, so I’m heading for the high seas. Go to a marina with a few friends and grab a big boat.
I own the Zombie Survival Guide
Living in leeds england, its about half an hours walk to the leeds armouries, a good museum with a shedload of armour and weapons, a single stairway and is nearby a canal for escapes. the only problem is food, which I will tool up in chainmaille and rush the nearest shop.
seriously, teeth will not get through that, unless its a horde i should be okay. Baracade or knock down the stairs and its basically a fortress, enough people and enough weapons/armour to defend it with ease. the only problem is getting the keys to the exhibits…
Zombies are cool, so I would run into the thickest mob of them so I could be one too!
But if you’re really going to learn to survive and recreate the world, hit up a Barnes and Noble. Seriously. Because no zombie is going to go to a bookstore and it could help you to grab some books on farming, technology and hell, firearms operation and repair.
lulz
I have a plan I might post later, but just really quickly, does it annoy anyone else that in that (repeatedly used) picture that the zombies stomach is annoyingly “un-zombified”?
I live in a village away from city so im just gonna go to the mountains, no zombie can climb up there. And when its winter and snow falls every zombie is gonna frezze and I can go and gather supplies.
With my wife, we have a survival kit. It’s a backpack with all sort of first aid stuff but also flashlight, cb radio,… So, we would grab it, go to the lift, get to the car, drive to the police building (only 1 km from here) and: or ask help or try to get inside and take as many weapons as we could and transform the place into a little fortress. I guess that we’d have to bring all the supplies we have in our basement…
I have the fortune to live a few minutes down the road from a 16th century Scottish tower house, and live next door to the guy with the keys, so I’d say I’m well set-up for a stronghold to ride it out in. Food, of course, could be an issue, since the few thousand zombies that were, until recently, my fellow townsfolk, would probably make a point of waiting patiently by the door, but I guess I’d have to deal with that…
Tim, I agree, everytime I see that picture his stomach jumps out at me and kills the illusion. His face is sooooo decayed, but his stomach is pristine. Guess he should have tucked his shirt in!